City life

If you’re a criminal, you should stop reading right now and perhaps even start crying in fear. Seriously, you ought to be trembling in your stolen clothes.

Because at this very moment, I’ve realized something crucial in my life – I am going to become the greatest crime fighter ever. You can call me Batman right now, although I have significantly less money, talent, and cool black suits.

How did I discover such talents and get inspired to fight crime? It’s simple. I found the City Life map created by the PixelHeads team.

Motorcycles in Minecraft PE? There’s definitely more aggression in the world now!

Police cars and law enforcement officers! Do you still have a pirated version of Minecraft Pocket Edition? Then we are coming for you!

And of course, how could we forget about firefighters? They were more than happy to take a picture with us while a building burned in the background!

When I added the map to my Minecraft PE, I envisioned exploring the vibrant city life, but instead, I spawned in a police station. Trust me, being behind bars is not the best way to start your day.

With shouts of “You’ll never take me alive!” I jumped out the window and accidentally noticed this sign.

What had he done? If he’s accused of being incredibly handsome, then his guilt is certainly proven!

The reward for him is huge – a whopping $5000! Criminals don’t pay, but capturing one is highly valued.

Just think about what you could do with that much money! You could donate it to charity or treat someone special – like me! Of course, I’ll choose the latter option.

I’m no stranger to fighting crime, but to catch such a criminal, I undoubtedly need a uniform, so I decided to try on a police skin.

Come to me, criminals!

The police officers addressed me very politely, using phrases like, “Have a good day, sir!” and “How are you doing, sir?”. Since I’m more accustomed to hearing, “The snacks in the cafeteria were for everyone!”, I was quite pleased with their demeanor.

Just think, if they treat me so kindly from the start, what will happen if I actually manage to deal with that criminal? I’ll be a god to them!

I can already see those headlines in the newspapers: “The Greatest Detective Since Sherlock Holmes!”.

Time’s up, criminals!

As soon as I stepped outside the police station, I spotted several police cars just waiting for me to drive them. I rushed over and hopped into one of them.

This might just be the best part of my job! I can easily grab a car to chase down a criminal, which means technically, it’s not theft at all.


Then I encountered a problem: I had no idea how to catch such monsters. So, I thought about starting to read “How to Catch a Criminal: A Beginner’s Guide,” but it’s pretty hard to read a book while driving, so I figured I’d approach it differently and wanted to read “How to Read a Book While Driving: A Beginner’s Guide,” only to run into another issue. I guess audiobooks would be the best choice.

It was extremely challenging to handle a book while managing a vehicle, so I made the only logical decision – to ignore the road. My apologies to all pedestrians I ran over. Justice is blind!

Nevertheless, the criminal was evading me. It turned out he was just as handsome as he was cunning. Therefore, I decided to jump out of the car, even though I should have parked it, and began strolling around the city. Maybe I could catch the bandit on foot?

I love night walks! But where’s my uniform? The police asked me to take it off 🙁

I started exploring the city and kept stumbling upon numerous shops that, for some reason, weren’t locked. Inside, there were plenty of chests filled with useful items I desperately needed. Now I understand why criminals love this city so much. But I can take things without being considered a criminal!

My pockets, stuffed with goodies, began to feel uncomfortable, but that wasn’t my only concern.

A troublesome undead appeared!

No. I came to this city to rid it of them, yet they found me here.

It seemed this city has a minor zombie problem. Which is quite unfortunate for me since I’m a big coward, and zombies make me cry like a baby.

But whining can wait – the city needs me! So once again, I apologize for having cried like a child. And I ran away. Like a child.

Desperate and lost, I approached a stranger who could guide me to safety.

This was the same stranger from whom another person was running away, shouting “Help, help!”. Friend, how can he assist you if you’re fleeing from him screaming?

“Hello, friend. Nice eye patch! Could you point me towards the nearest shelter? I wouldn’t mind sharing one of my pies with you.”

“Oh, looks like you accidentally hit me! No worries, that happens to me all the time!”

“Hey, seems like he sent me back to spawn! His name is Bandit. What kind of name is that? Is he German?”

Alright, I don’t have time to mourn my own death – I have a mission to catch a criminal. It’s unfortunate that I couldn’t find out the number of that nighttime stranger. We could have been best friends forever, and he could have helped me track down the criminal!

So, I decided to take another look at the photo of the criminal to make searching easier.

Wait a minute…

Hmm…

What an interesting coincidence! My best friend forever looks strikingly similar to the criminal I’m after. Identical!

Wait a second…

Oh dear.

Oh no.

The New Sheriff Can’t Catch the Criminal

It’s tough to admit that my actions have resulted in a massive failure. Even a pleasant bike ride around the city couldn’t save me. Perhaps because I don’t know how to ride it?

I toss aside my broken bicycle and begin wandering through the city, horrified by what just happened. Right across from me, a man yells, “I love this city!”.

Me too, buddy. Me too.

There was no reason for my bad mood to improve. So, I decided to go to the movies. Movies always lift your spirits, right?

Knowing my luck, they’re probably showing something like “Someone Dropped Their Ice Cream Before They Could Taste It”.

Thus, I had to turn toward this school: